Commandments

These were written in 1999 but made me smile today

COMMANDMENTS for HIXON KIDS

1. Thou shalt not argue with thy siblings with respect to automobile seat preference
2. Thou shalt not close thy bedroom door in an attempt to exclude thy little sister from thine activities
3. Thou shalt not arise from thy bed after thy parents have tucked thee in for the night, nor shalt thou continue to talk, sing, or play after such time. (Thou mayest arise only if thy bladder runneth over)
4. Thou shalt not bite people, even if thou art angry
5. Thou shalt not use the interior windshield on the passenger side of thy father’s car as a resting place for thine feet
6. Thou shalt not tattle
7. Thou shalt exit all vehicles from the door nearest thy seat
8. Thou shalt not become infatuated with, nor propose marriage to waitresses, flight attendants, or furniture sales personnel
9. He that sleepest in his clothing, shall not continue to wear them the following day, even if they stinketh not
10. Thou shalt eat all of thy dinner, unless thou art served legumes, in which case thou mayest creatively discard these as long as thy mother seest not.