I have a couple of children that apparently are going through a hyper-defiant stage. It doesn’t matter what we ask of them, they always resist, give us lip, and try to at least delay the task through debate. Even the smallest things.
“Can you take this into the family room?
“Why do I have to? Why can’t you ask Natalie?”
I am so tempted to answer “I did. She asked me why I didn’t ask you” but the irony would be lost on them and civil war would ensue so I don’t.
Oh, I love this one: “In a minute, I’m in the middle of something.”
They could be watching their leg muscles atrophy or be doodling the word ”bored.” The middle of something, sheesh. The playlist on their iPod? A disobedient era? What?
And it doesn’t matter what we say, their reflex is to resist, to debate, and to demur.
“Here, put this $1,000 in your pocket, eat this candy, and try out this video game.”
“Why do I have to do everything?”
Maybe that is the secret: ask them for the opposite. Let the reflex work in our favor, I can hear it now:
“Do not put your laundry away, and whenever is cool.”
“I can do whatever I want and I’ll do it right now!”
“Can you ask your sister to come unload the dishwasher?”
“Why does she get to do all the fun jobs? I’m doing it myself.”
“While Mom cuts the cake, hover over her like an emaciated hyena and snatch the largest piece for yourself.”
“I can’t; I’m in the middle of something.”
1 comment:
hilarious!
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