Writing Career - Part 1

For over ten years, I have been told that my stories (about my kids) should be published so for the past several months I have been working on a compilation of stories as recorded in my journals. I have over 40,000 words! I did some research on the publishing process, literary agents, and query letters. In late January I began sending query letters and proposals to agents and publishers. So far I have not heard back from six of them and I have two “no thanks.”

I know, I know, eight is not very many and I shouldn’t be discouraged. I’m not, actually. It is kind of a tough book idea to sell and I fancy myself a better writer than salesman. Also, I am unpublished so someone is going to have to really love the idea.

I’m not giving up, but I am a realist. I realized earlier this week that perhaps my work is more suited for publication in a magazine. Besides, if I got a story or two published in a magazine, I would gain a little traction as a writer. Anyway, today I did some on-line research of Family Fun and was encouraged at the specificity of their submission guidelines. I have a couple of stories that might just work for their Creative Solutions section. Here is one of two stories that I sent them: NO! I think I found a parenting stratagem that actually worked! I asked Amanda (8) to fetch a diaper and, as usual, she pulled a face and groaned. This has been a struggle lately with her - she resents doing anything and feels that we “make” her do too much. I don’t think we do but for just a moment I put myself in her shoes and figured it might be frustrating and tiresome to have to always jump at your parents’ slightest request. With this thought, I decided to give her a “no” allowance. I told her that she didn’t have to get the diaper; I’d let her have one “no” that day. She was in shock. However, once she realized that I was serious, she jumped right up and got the diaper. “I’m not going to waste my ‘no’ on this,” she said.

All day long she was very obedient. On a couple of occasions I had to remind her that she was on the verge of spending her “no” and immediately she changed course. She was hoarding this power and was not going to let it go. For this kind of obedience I’ll give her one every day! In the early evening she tipped her hand, telling me her plan to spend her defiant allowance when we asked her to go to bed. Fair enough, but after twenty minutes I could ask her again. She agreed to this stipulation and continued to hold her chip. I could have asked her to do just about anything! Bathroom floors? Clean the sink traps? At bedtime, after the potty-teeth-prayers ritual, she stood by her bed and waited for me to actually tell her to get in it. Then she smiled and said, “No,” and then with chin pointed up she walked out of the room. I loved it: scheduled and staged disobedience. You know, the whole deal makes sense. By giving her the right to disobey once, we made all future obedience a choice of hers rather than an irrevocable mandate barked out by us. Knowing she could decline any task at any time helped her to do every task more cheerfully. And it didn’t cost me anything, other than letting her stay up an extra twenty minutes!