What I Said vs. What I Thought

Given my vocal issues (and my generally pleasant nature) I don’t always say what comes to mind. Tonight is the High School’s homecoming dance. This afternoon Kara asked me to go the grocery store to buy a boutonnière for Amanda’s date AND a corsage for her.

What I wanted to say: Why do I have to buy the corsage?

What I said: OK

In the floral department I found two worker ladies chatting, no customers. I said to the one (mid 50s, sour expression, made me glad she isn’t my grandma) “I need to get a wrist corsage and a boutonnière.” She said, “Well, we don’t have any made up.” That was it. That was the end of her comment. I guess it was my turn to say something.

What I wanted to say: Well, there are tons of flowers in this supermarket Eden, and ribbons, and stuff. If we could only find a floral department employee with a little free time. Wait a minute, Maude, I’m getting a crazy idea! Now this is just an idea so don’t hate me, but maybe you (gasp) could make one.”

What I said: Could I have them made? You know, in an hour or two? Maybe?

She agreed to make them and then asked what color. I was ready for her as I got very specific instructions from Kara on this. Off-white with ribbons that are either silver or black and white. She ducked into the cool room but returned looking a little distressed. She said, “I’m out of off-white. I only have cream or egg-shell.”

What I wanted to say: “C’mon Maude. Lie to me.”

What I wanted to say #2: Do I look like I care about color subtleties? Don't I look straight? I haven't shaved for three days. Maybe it is my tan shorts and gray T-shirt. (or is it off-gray? Or is it Slate? Graphite?)

What I said: “Cream should be fine.”

Then she pulled out the box of ribbons. I repeated silver or black and white. She stretched out a silver and black striped deal and asked if it was OK.

What I said: Sure, that looks fine.

What I wanted to say: You’re not so hot with prepositions, are you?

What I wanted to say #2: She’s going to homecoming, not a Raiders game.

But it all worked out fine. Kara thought I did a good job, and Amanda too.